Welcome to Kaffy's Dating Blog! I made this website to talk about my dating experiences. I will talk about girl's I met online, in bars in, clubs and anywhere else I may meet one.
11/15/08: Dating Different Races
WHITE WOMEN:
First date: You get to kiss her goodnight.
Second date: You get to grope all over and make out a bit.
Third date: You get to have sex but only in the missionary position.
IRISH WOMEN:
First Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
Second Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
20th Anniversary: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
ITALIAN WOMEN:
First Date: You take her to a play and an expensive restaurant.
Second Date: You meet her parents and her Mom makes spaghetti & meatballs.
Third Date: You have sex, she wants to marry you & insists on a 3-carat ring.
5th Anniversary: You already have 5 kids together & hate the thought of having sex.
6th Anniversary: You find yourself a Mistress.
JEWISH WOMEN:
First Date: You get terrific head.
Second Date: You get even more great head.
Third Date: You tell her you’ll marry her and never get head again.
CHINESE WOMEN:
First date: You get to buy her an expensive dinner but nothing happens.
Second date: You buy her an even more expensive dinner. Nothing happens again.
Third date: You don’t even get to the third date and you’ve already realized nothing is ever going to happen.
INDIAN WOMEN:
First date: Meet her parents.
Second date: Set the date of the wedding.
Third date: Wedding night.
BLACK WOMEN:
First Date: You get to buy her a real expensive dinner.
Second Date: You get to buy her and her girlfriends a real expensive dinner.
Third Date: You get to pay her rent.
Tenth Date: She’s pregnant by someone other than you.
MEXICAN WOMEN:
First Date: You buy her an expensive dinner, get drunk on Tequila, and have sex in the back of her car.
Second Date: She’s pregnant.
Third Date: She moves in. One week later, her mother, father, his girlfriend, her two sisters, her brother, all of their kids, her grandma, her father’s girlfriend’s mother, her two cousins, her sister’s Boyfriend and his three kids move in and you live on rice and beans for the rest of your life in your home that used to be nice, but now looks like a home along the Tijuana strip.
ARAB WOMEN:
First Date: Mother, Father, Brothers, Sisters, Cousins, Aunts, Uncles, Friends and entire arab community finds out.
Second Date: You are shot dead.
No third date.
First date: You get to kiss her goodnight.
Second date: You get to grope all over and make out a bit.
Third date: You get to have sex but only in the missionary position.
IRISH WOMEN:
First Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
Second Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
20th Anniversary: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
ITALIAN WOMEN:
First Date: You take her to a play and an expensive restaurant.
Second Date: You meet her parents and her Mom makes spaghetti & meatballs.
Third Date: You have sex, she wants to marry you & insists on a 3-carat ring.
5th Anniversary: You already have 5 kids together & hate the thought of having sex.
6th Anniversary: You find yourself a Mistress.
JEWISH WOMEN:
First Date: You get terrific head.
Second Date: You get even more great head.
Third Date: You tell her you’ll marry her and never get head again.
CHINESE WOMEN:
First date: You get to buy her an expensive dinner but nothing happens.
Second date: You buy her an even more expensive dinner. Nothing happens again.
Third date: You don’t even get to the third date and you’ve already realized nothing is ever going to happen.
INDIAN WOMEN:
First date: Meet her parents.
Second date: Set the date of the wedding.
Third date: Wedding night.
BLACK WOMEN:
First Date: You get to buy her a real expensive dinner.
Second Date: You get to buy her and her girlfriends a real expensive dinner.
Third Date: You get to pay her rent.
Tenth Date: She’s pregnant by someone other than you.
MEXICAN WOMEN:
First Date: You buy her an expensive dinner, get drunk on Tequila, and have sex in the back of her car.
Second Date: She’s pregnant.
Third Date: She moves in. One week later, her mother, father, his girlfriend, her two sisters, her brother, all of their kids, her grandma, her father’s girlfriend’s mother, her two cousins, her sister’s Boyfriend and his three kids move in and you live on rice and beans for the rest of your life in your home that used to be nice, but now looks like a home along the Tijuana strip.
ARAB WOMEN:
First Date: Mother, Father, Brothers, Sisters, Cousins, Aunts, Uncles, Friends and entire arab community finds out.
Second Date: You are shot dead.
No third date.
10/18/08: Cutie
Cutie Fan
10/14/08: Tried some more sex toys
I tried 2 more sex toys/game last night. The first were Tweezer Nipple Clamps. I mostly just used these for a lingerie show she gave me and we took a ton of photos. The Nipple Clamps made the pix look more sexy and hardcore especially when I added my old whip. Next we tried the Strip Chocolate Game. I couldn't picture have much fun with this, I didn't think it was my style. But it was fun in an unexpected way. It wasn't sexy for us, but instead it was hilarious. I kept only landing on the chocolate squares, so I was constantly painting chocolate drawings on her, and we were cracking up cause she was covered with my really bad drawings. It was a good time.
09/11/08: Started playing tennis
I just started paling tennis, I'm pretty bad right now, but have some friends teaching me. Problem is they all play in couples. So, I started talking to this girl Lorena on Tennis Matchmaking , hopefully she's good and will teach me a thing or two ;-)
My wrist was hurting bad last time I played though. I think I'll try buying a wrist support and see if that helps.
My wrist was hurting bad last time I played though. I think I'll try buying a wrist support and see if that helps.
09/09/08: Tried out some new sex toys last night.
I tried out two new sextoys last night. First I set the mood right with candles then I blindfolded her. After that I started using the Pinwheel on her you see in the photo, also known at the Wartenberg Wheel. She had a lot of reactions. First it scared the crap out of her, then she was liking it, then in certain areas it was tickling her. I then moved on and used the doorjam cuffs I bought. These badboys where awesome, much better than regular handcuffs. They where very easy to attach to the door and put on her, so no time was wasted. It's nice because it allows you to bang her her hard for a while against the door with her legs over your shoulders and you both won't be tired. I highly recommend the Door Jam Cuffs. I got them at this store.
08/23/08: Dictionary for Women’s Personal Ads
40-ish..................................49.
Adventurous..........................Slept with everyone.
Athletic................................No breasts.
Average looking.....................Moooo.
Beautiful..............................Pathological liar.
Emotionally Secure..................On medication.
Feminist...............................Fat.
Free Spirit.................................Junkie.
Friendship first.......................Former Slut.
New-Age.........................Body hair in the wrong places.
Old-fashioned........................No B.J.'s
Open-minded.........................Desperate.
Outgoing..............................Loud and embarrassing.
Professional................. ..........Bitch.
Voluptuous...........................Very fat.
Large frame...........................Hugely fat.
Wants soul mate.....................Stalker.
Adventurous..........................Slept with everyone.
Athletic................................No breasts.
Average looking.....................Moooo.
Beautiful..............................Pathological liar.
Emotionally Secure..................On medication.
Feminist...............................Fat.
Free Spirit.................................Junkie.
Friendship first.......................Former Slut.
New-Age.........................Body hair in the wrong places.
Old-fashioned........................No B.J.'s
Open-minded.........................Desperate.
Outgoing..............................Loud and embarrassing.
Professional................. ..........Bitch.
Voluptuous...........................Very fat.
Large frame...........................Hugely fat.
Wants soul mate.....................Stalker.
01/23/08: This has nothing to do with dating
This has nothing to do with dating, but I really dislike cilantro.
So I wanted to throw this site a shout out to help their cause :)
Ban Cilantro
Find more photos like this on BanCilantro.com
So I wanted to throw this site a shout out to help their cause :)
Ban Cilantro
Find more photos like this on BanCilantro.com
01/02/08: Got my first rim job today
I got my first rim job today. I'm not sure why she did it or why people like it. I guess I only like seeing how nasty she was, other than that the feeling just kind of tickelish
11/28/07: Got back from Thanksgiving
Just got back from up north for visiting the fam for Thanksgiving. Nothing is better than Mom's turkey and gravy!
10/22/07: Best sex ever
had some great sex with this girl last night I met on the online dating site IntimateAdults.com. She wasn't much to look at in the face, but had a great body and knew how to work it. The best part is she was freaky as hell.
